Got a Question? Author Gail Harris says your heart has the answer.
It’s easy to feel confused about making what we think is the “right” decision. Gail Harris, author of Your Heart Knows the Answer spent years listening the voices of other people. “I’d often hear my heart’s messages,” she admits. “But I didn’t have the confidence to listen.”
“This was especially true during my five-year struggle with infertility,” Harris explains. “My heart’s knowledge that I would indeed become a mother was snuffed out by anxiety, self-doubt and fear.” When Harris finally became pregnant with twins, she lost them at 22 weeks. “It was at this point, I decided I would teach myself to recognize my heart’s messages and live by them,” she says. Ultimately, she delivered a healthy baby boy, and thanks her heart’s wisdom for the blessing. Here, Harris shares with the Garage Girls how tuning in can help us all transform.
What inspired you to write about the messages of the heart?
For years, I lived my life not trusting my heart’s messages, not living as the best person I knew I could be. Instead of making the choices that are right for me, I listened to all those outside influences that bombard each of us everyday. Messages from friends, and family, which although well meaning, told me that I was “too” this or “too” that. Messages I picked up in books and magazines that told me I “should” do this and “shouldn’t” do that. I would often hear my heart’s messages, but never had the confidence to listen.
This was especially true during my five-year struggle with infertility, when my heart’s knowledge that I would, indeed, become a mother was snuffed out by anxiety, self-doubt and fear. When I finally did become pregnant with twins, but lost them at 22 weeks into my perfect pregnancy, I knew then that my choice was clear. I had to learn how to listen to my heart’s messages to get through this time. I decided that I would teach myself how to recognize my heart’s messages and to live by them. As my life began to transform from one filled with misery and self-doubt to one filled with happiness and bliss—(and a beautiful baby boy)—my heart, yet again, guided me to write this book in order to share with other’s what I have learned and to help them live a truly fulfilled life as I have learned to do.
What is the biggest revelation you discovered by listening to your heart?
In order to be the best person you really know you can be and have a fulfilling, happy life, you have to trust yourself. In addition, you must know that when you follow your heart’s messages you will make the right choices because your heart knows the answer.
Why do we often miss the messages of our heart?
Those external influences that bombard us from every which direction have a strong hold on us. They are like negative voices that we hear over and over again; telling us what is right or important for us. Too often, rather than listening to our hearts, we listen to those influences that make us afraid, that hold us back from being all we can be. (How many times has your heart known something, but you didn’t listen and then paid dearly for it later?) They are like a veil that shrouds our inner wisdom. When we are disconnected from this inner wisdom, it’s impossible to trust ourselves and make the right choices. We will look outside of ourselves for our own happiness and, therefore, will never find it.
How can we optimize the connection to our inner voice? How do we know
that the messages we're getting aren't from the ego?
First, you must connect with your desire to listen to your heart. Those outside influences are powerful, and without this connection, they will surely prevail. Then, you must learn how to recognize when your heart is speaking to you. In other words, you must learn how to differentiate your heart’s messages from those outside influences. With a little practice, you will learn that your heart’s messages have characteristics that distinguish it from the ego such as its intention, guiding themes, key words and phrases, and its quality and tone voice. Using practices such as ceremony and guided mediation, which quiet the mind, can also help you to connect with your heart. As you become more successful at recognizing your inner wisdom and, as a result, your confidence grows as you make the right choices, your connection to this wisdom will grow stronger and stronger.
How can listening to our hearts help us to make peace with our bodies?
By listening to our hearts (and only by listening to your hearts), we can discover the unique beauty of our own bodies, because we will no longer be listening to the beauty and fashion industry, which tell us that our bodies should look different from the way they look. Then, we can truly make peace with our bodies. Once we can accept and even love our bodies as they are, our healthy weight will naturally emerge.
What would our hearts tell us about how we spend our time?
Our to-do list can shrink down more than half its size because many of the things we busy ourselves with throughout the day are things that we’ve been told we “should” do. And when we spend time doing things that don’t come from our hearts, they seem to take twice as long. When you spend your day listening to your heart, you’ll get so much more done than you ever imagined. Time will all but disappear because you’ll be doing what’s truly important to you! And you’ll be so much more relaxed.